“It’s tomorrow.”- Christopher Robin
“It’s usually today.”- Winnie the Pooh
This is perhaps my favorite line from Disney’s new Christopher Robin movie which imagines a grown up version of the childhood friend of Winnie the Pooh and his pals. In the film, Christopher has forgotten his friends, become obsessed with work, and neglects his wife and daughter. Overall, he seems to have forgotten how to enjoy his life.
He never rests, never plays, and always feels pulled in multiple directions at once. The stress and anxiety feel overwhelming to adult Christopher Robin. This is an age old conundrum. A troubling aspect of adulthood we all recognize.
Enter Winnie the Pooh. He comes back into Christopher’s life when he needs them the most, becoming a sort of spiritual guide. Pooh immediately recognizes the problem and offers simple, but profound answers, as Winnie the Pooh is prone to do.
Pooh’s answer for this problem resonated strongly with me. What stuck me throughout the film was Pooh’s admonitions to Christopher Robin to be present. Christopher is worried about tomorrow and worried about the day after that and stressed about a day years from now. He is so caught up with tomorrow he fails to recognize what is happening to him today.
I suppose these admonitions to be present resonate with me because I am guilty of the same sins as Christopher Robin. I miss time with my kids and I do not watch enough sunsets and life moves at such an incredible pace it catches me up, moving me along past my actual life. Everything is happening tomorrow.
And this, my friends, produces a good deal of anxiety. My worry about how tomorrow will turn out keeps me up at night. It takes me out of the moment. Anxiety, unchecked, grows unbearable and I chase easy solutions to take away the anxiety, distractions which further takes me out of today.
The root of anxiety is fear. Fear I will not be able to handle the difficult circumstances of some unknown future. I fear for myself, my family, my friends. I fear the world will be unbearable and ultimately, result in crushing me. Whatever I am afraid will happen tomorrow, I am certain I will not be able to handle it, whenever it comes.
So I try to control it. To manage it. To ensure an outcome that does not result in crushing agony or death. I work harder, I push through, I plan better, I save more money, I do more of the thing I am certain will make tomorrow work out.
Those controlling and managing solutions rarely work to reduce the anxiety. In fact, they only heighten the fear. I am not able to control the future after all. The main result is I miss what is important about today.
In the movie, Adult Christopher Robin clutches tightly to his briefcase filled with papers for a big business meeting he has tomorrow. Trying to understand this briefcase in his own way, Winnie the Pooh dubs it Christopher’s “case of important things.”
Later when Christopher mentions his daughter Madeline, Pooh asks innocently, ““What’s a Madeline? Is it more important than your case of important things?”
His daughter is, of course, more important than his case of important things and Christopher Robin sets off to re-organize his priorities. He starts to set today, rather than tomorrow, as the priority. The people in his life today. The things he gets to enjoy today. It is a simple reorientation but a desperately needed one.
When I am fully present in today, anxiety drops tremendously. Joy increases and my people feel loved and cared for.
So I’m resolving to be more present in life, to delay worry about tomorrow by focusing on today. I cannot fully control what might happen at work but I can control if I read one more story to my kids, spend more time with my wife, or call my friend I haven’t talked to in a while. It is today after all.
If anxiety feels too overwhelming or you need practical ways to be more present, we’d love to help. We strive to make the first step the easiest and offer a risk-free initial appointment where we help you determine which of our amazing therapists would be a good fit for you. If you are not completely satisfied, you owe nothing and we will even help you get connected with a therapist outside our practice.
You can schedule online at any time at mathewscounseling.net or give us a call Monday through Friday at 919-587-8018.
